Strength to the submissive

To have faith is to trust yourself to the water. When you swim you don't grab hold of the water, because if you do you will sink and drown. Instead you relax, and float.

                                                            Alan Watts

Too often we find people who abandoned who they really are, gave up on their hopes and dreams or picked a path based on what society perhaps told you was appropriate. It is a real shame to see this, but there are people out there who fight tooth and nail to be the best they possibly can while holding their true self and desires as close as ever. 

As a submissive I would assume you are one of those people, weather you are male or female. 

The word itself has such a negative connotation these days, people seem to think it means weak, unable to think for oneself, incapable of leadership, allowing oneself to be walked over or taken advantage of, doormat, fragile, meek, timid...

No, that is not the case anymore. Perhaps once upon a time when females had no choice and were even beaten or locked away in mental institutes for attempting to be dominant... I can understand how someone who has been suppressed and virtually abused their whole life would be a little timid and meek.

But now we have the choice, we are not (as) suppressed. We are strong humans with a genuine desire to serve. Lets work together to give the word -submissive- a fresh meaning.

Gender should not be an issue, yet we still face these challenges

Being a female in today's world means it is widely expected you are independent and strong, almost as though you need to put on the pants and strive to be a man in a male dominated society. Now that is not to say submissive's are not strong and independent people, because many if not the majority of us are. It is to say that in the last 50 years, relying on, or giving yourself completely to another has become somewhat frowned upon. We finally have freedom as an equal gender, usually. It is understandable that there is a little bit of stigma regarding females who wish to submit. But feminism is about having the option to pick and choose what YOU want with your life, not have another pick for you.

Now for men it has always been expected that you will be strong and independent. From a young age you have been taught that certain feelings or that too much feeling is not acceptable. To submit to someone, especially a woman, is something that is frowned upon by so many people whether we like it or not. It is considered weak and degrading and it is completely unfair. You are the strong and dominant gender, right? (Sarcasm) No, you are who-ever and what-ever you want to be. Besides, you are one hell of a strong person if you stick with what you want even when bombarded with the general ignorance of the masses telling you that as a man you submit to no one. 


This is what you are

• Strong, you enjoy putting others first
• Brave, you trust in the will of your Dominant
• Loving, you are willing to give him/her everything
• Gentle and receptive while being tough and brave
• Humble, able to learn from your mistakes
• Dedicated, willing to really give it your all
• Beautiful, a gift to be cherished
• Balanced, creating a gentle dynamic that flows.

But we push through anyway, knowing in our heart what we desire

Those of you that push past these social stigmas and keep heading towards what you feel is right in your heart, you are wonderful. You do what you feel is right for you, not what a culture or group of people said you should be doing. That is something to be very proud of my friends.

We have such strength and grace, the opposite of weakness

Submissive's are incredibly strong people. They know what they want, they work on themselves and they strive to be the best they can. They embrace fear and push boundaries, opening their hearts fully to another human being, knowing perfectly well this person could crush them in an instant.

We are brave enough to fall, we know we will find safety

But here we are, leaping into the void with open arms. We are completely vulnerable and free, even with chains around our bodies. We don't know what the future will hold but we trust that we can make it beautiful. We trust in our choice of partner and we give them everything, even the things we are too afraid to give ourselves. This takes such a huge amount of strength, it really does.

When you are told to do something by a dominant, and you know it is not what you do but you still put your faith in that person and let them pick for you. That is not easy and it deserves so much respect. When you are tied down and blindfolded, and your Master or Mistress is guiding you through something that is likely going to be scary and painful, but still you push on with such beautiful dedication and will. When you are in an argument with your husband or wife who also happens to be your Dominant, and you take a deep breath and let them have control even when you would rather give them a slap on the face... See what I mean?

You are something to be admired

When you submit... You are saying "Here I am world, come take me and give me the best you have and I promise I will come out better than ever!" See it is not just about having faith in your partner; you have to have a degree of faith in the universe. I don't mean blind faith here either. You made an informed decision to live life as you see it because it is better to live fully or not at all.

You are open minded too, am I right? You are not a judgmental person, but instead one who has empathy and a heart that reaches out to others in times of need. You love to see people smile, and it is even better when you know you had something to do with that smile. You strive to make those around you feel just a little bit better, and now you are seeking someone you can truly dedicate that side of yourself to.

Take it all in, hold these thoughts close

See it's not about needing guidance, you are perfectly capable of that yourself. But wanting guidance is another thing altogether, wanting to feel that same love given back to you that you so often give to others. To feel needed and desired, appreciated and loved while doing your best to give that to the other person. In a world where you spend so much time looking after others, you can finally feel what it is like to have someone deeply looking after you also.

All of you submissive folk are beautiful people. Don't you ever forget that.


I would love to know what you think your personal strengths are as a Submissive, or perhaps the things you are proud of in your Sub as a loving Dominant. Leave a comment below!


Picture found here.