So, what is BDSM?
 |
| Such a beautiful pony girl, shall we take you for a walk? |
What is BDSM?
BDSM is an umbrella term that covers many things. It basically means Bondage, Discipline, Sadism and Masochism. However these days, it really covers most if not all forms of erotic practices that involve things like dominance and submission, role-playing, restraint, pain, service ETC.
It is a term for the wild world of kink, alternative and usually but not always erotic lifestyle. BDSM is always consensual, even when it seems it is not.
What is D/s?
D/s stands for Dominance and Submission. It is again a kind of umbrella term for many different types of power exchange relationships. Basically is where one member of a relationship is in control, and the other member, willingly gives up some of their control.
There are many names and styles for Dominant's and Submissive's, the other most common name being Top and Bottom. There is also Master and Slave, Master and Pet, Dom and Sub or Daddy and Babygirl. As you can see, the different relationships almost always depend on the type of submissive and the style of the Dominant.
There are also different degrees of D/s relationships. Some people live the lifestyle 24/7, a few hours a day, a few days a week, or just for play/sex. It is up to you to explore and enjoy.
I need to stress, that although it may seem to a beginners mind, this is in no way a one way relationship. It may seem like the Dominant gets everything that he could possibly want, and the Submissive gets nothing in return. But this could not be further from the truth.
The Dominant needs to work just as hard. He is 100% responsible for his Submissive, in ALL ways. That means if she is upset, then he takes responsibility. This does not mean it is his fault, but it does mean he needs to fix it. Of course it is her problem, but it is now his problem FIRST. He does not get angry or upset, he has self-control, and he rights the problem. Starting to get what I am saying?
Basically, the Submissive gives herself completely in return for his taking complete responsibly for her. But, this is in no way as simple as it sounds. I need to stress that this is something that takes much trust and a lot of learning for both parties.
To sum it up:
- The submissive is: Giving up control. Putting her life and power into his hands. ALWAYS putting his opinions and views first. Never questioning him, knowing that his word is law.
- The Dominant is: Caring for her or him in all ways. Making sure he or she is satisfied and has everything he or she needs. Making sure she is happy. Fixing anything that is wrong. Taking responsibly for her actions, feelings and doing his best to create a wonderful safe and secure world in his arms.
“When a woman submits to a man, it's the most precious gift she can give. Herself. Unreservedly. The man has to respect and honor that gift above all else. Even if he respects nothing else in the world, he must respect the woman in his care. It's his sworn duty to protect, honor and cherish his submissive. To take care of her and provide a safe haven. Someone who would put his own needs above his woman's is no man.”
― Maya Banks, Sweet Addiction
0 comments:
Post a Comment